is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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