You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
