I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
17 Women That Lost Condoms Up Their Lady Parts
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
23 People Confess The Most F*cked Up Thing Guests Have Done In Their House
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom