Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I think im going to throw up on grandma
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
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