We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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