Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
