Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Randomize
