he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
The power of my boobs compel you
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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