Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
