It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
We had to coat check the pizza.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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