i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Randomize
