It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
