I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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