My Higher Power is John Stamos
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
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