I just made out with a guy for $7.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
My vagina is officially offended.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
