sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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