Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize