it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
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