so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
