White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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