She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
You left your phone here
Wait...
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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