well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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