Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
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