i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Congratulations! We have a period
Randomize
