All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
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