yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
