awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
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