can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize