On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
