I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
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