an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
