man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Damn victory sex feels great
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
