You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
My vagina is very pro this idea
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
