i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Randomize
