I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
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