so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
