Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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