I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
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