I bet he comes in French.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Randomize
