sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
