New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
