So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
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