I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
you would pick up someone in the library
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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