i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
