Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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