I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
your like the ambassador to my penis.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Randomize
