shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
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