I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
