When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Sex in the backyard? Check.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
