So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Randomize
