if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Randomize