question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
